Life’s Persistent Questions

The Not-Song Writer’s Corner

This is an Update of a previous article

I am NOT a composer. I am NOT a song writer. I have too much respect for composers and song writers to declare myself a part of the Pantheon. I am just a piano player whose fingers wander. My initiation into the world of music was strictly an introduction to note reading. For some amazing reason deciphering musical notation was always easy for me. Too easy, maybe!?

This might sound like an enviable skill, but I want to tell you that the amount of ease with seeing notation, interpreting the notation, and navigating the keyboard to respond to it made it VERY difficult to memorize. When I read music, I didn’t have to think. I never consciously considered patterns or analyzed melodies and harmonies.

I also never had to use my “ear” to find the right piano keys, so playing by ear was a greater task than reading. Thus, my lazy nature led me to complacency. I didn’t see any reason to memorize, or to play by ear.

What rescued me from being note-bound was my love for jazz. I had to learn to improvise in order to even be considered for the 2^nd Jazz Band in college. With the help of a couple fraternity brothers in the 1^st Jazz Band, I set off on a quest to improvise. I had a couple of harmonic patterns, and a couple of scales that I started using, and I was off… like the Hare in the famous race you might have heard tell of.

Using my newly found ear, and some basic Music Theory I was able to begin creating arrangements of both choral and instrumental pieces. I think arranging was a gateway for me. The lyrics of vocal music were there. The melody and the harmonies were preset. My curiosity allowed me to try using alternate chords, and my Music Theory had explained non-chord tones. Gradually, I was able to create arrangements that were fun, and sometimes, even beautiful.

When I began to try to actually write songs I had the biggest problem with words. Piano players don’t have to deal with words. I discovered that meter (poetic meter) was important. I discovered that my lyrics didn’t always have to rhyme. I didn’t really make a science of writing lyrics, but through many efforts the lyrics began to emerge more easily.

The first song I can remember became a novelty song I called Life’s Persistent Questions. I had developed a program that I presented at several Adult Day Centers in the Twin Cities, using old Novelty Songs. I sang the verses and had the audience participate by joining me on the choruses. These programs were fun for me, and I acquired 8-10 sites where I would gig once a month. I wanted to write my own Novelty Song… but nothing ever came to me.

Then I came across a stray phrase: What will you do when your Velcro loses its grip? I knew that lyric would someday be the basis of a great song. As hard as I tried I couldn’t come up with any other lyrics that were as fun. I wrote the phrase down on a piece of paper and hid it away in a box where I kept reward stickers for my piano students. Every so often I would see the phrase, and still… nothing!

One morning, at least five years later, I was in the bathroom cleaning out my electric razor. I didn’t regularly use the electric, but I had obviously resorted to it enough that it needed to be cleaned. When I emptied it out I saw a fine brownish powder, remnants of my nascent beard. When I looked down into the sink I saw what appeared to be Gumbo Filé. Instantly I saw the answer to my lyric problem!

Tell me what do you see when you empty out your razor? Little tiny hairs, looks like Gumbo Filé! The best way to begin my song. I would save the Velcro question for the “hook” of the song. OK! Now what? I soon decided that some of the cute questions (unanswerable) that you sometimes hear would make great lyrics. They wouldn’t have to rhyme, either. After all, I knew I wasn’t a song writer, so I could just make my own rules.

If at first you don’t succeed, should you really try sky-diving? And another, Why does the night FALL and the day BREAK? Oooh, better yet, If you stuck some buttered bread to the back of a cat, and dropped him from on high, how would it land? I thought I was starting to get somewhere.

I decided to Google unanswered question. There were a good number, and I had many choices. The more ridiculous, the better. I had started a Novelty song with the lyrics. They would never fit into a rhyme scheme, and the meter would have to be adapted. I knew that. I only worried that I was over-thinking something that should be fun, and natural. Now… the piano part. I had to think of a style, harmony, and how the piano and the voice would fit.

Not having much experience with this I tried to think of a songwriter that had Novelty Songs to his/her credit. Randy Newman came into mind. He played the piano, belted out his songs in a strong baritone, and always had fun. I wanted to channel Randy Newman. I started improvising some chords and found a harmonic progression. I knew I want to use the same progression for each of the unanswered questions. With a little experimenting, I was able to adjust the melody to the different rhythms of the text using pop piano chords.

The result was fun, and the quality was good enough for me. After all I could hide behind the caveat that I am not a composer, NOT a song writer. In my defense, I view composers to be Chopin, Liszt, Beethoven, Bach… You get it! And song writers: Adele, Carol King, Barry Manilow and James Taylor. Writers that can make you feel, smile, cry. My song was a Novelty, so it didn’t have to be good!

I actually have had opportunities to perform the song. It worked, and people had the right response… they smiled. They laughed. They enjoyed. I know that I can’t merely decide to write a song, sit down and control the creative forces. They must be in me, somewhere, but I can’t access them at will. I will continue to play my piano, practice and perform, and when I can’t resist I will probably write another song.

If you are curious, you can hear this song on SoundCloud at

Do you know a pianist or a music teacher that might enjoy Fingers Dancing? Please feel free to SHARE this with them. I have a growing number of articles describing my two journeys, as a pianist, and as a piano teacher that have merged, enhanced each other, and made my life very full.